Help me with this rhyme

2010-05-29 02:33:24 by Sexual-Lobster

Picture them over the top of the Squidhunting Manwhore loop - fast paced and monotone.

It would be rapped by Fernando, if anyone remembers him.

Here's what i got so far:

Love as large as brontosaurus
Passion like a bleeding walrus
Our love is real it's no mirage
Want to lock you in my garage


BTW Fernando is a kind and gentle soul, sure he's creepy but no explicit violent stuff please.

I know the garage line is seedy but it's meant in a playful way, I think there's a line of good taste.


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2010-05-29 02:42:52

sensual motions of my strong hands
it turns rough like the desert sands
your grip like a throbbing crustacean
our groins giving off radiation

drenched in our sweaty brine
is this blood yours or mine?

Sexual-Lobster responds:

ooh nice finish!


2010-05-29 03:06:17

I grow tall great courage mountain
Look, not twice there's a hat like fountain
Remember to always send out orange
rap rap rap rap rap rap rap
rap rap rap r-rap rap rap.


2010-05-29 03:06:40

At first we touch through the morning mist
filled with lust, i can't resist
Then our lips press together
gracefully, as soft as a feather

[Insert epic keyboard solo]

I hold you back and ask for your number
you squeeze my hand and pull out some lumber

Sexual-Lobster responds:

At first we touch through the morning mist
filled with lust, i can't resist

...that's beautiful, man...


2010-05-29 03:16:47

My groin filled with much frustration
Hard like a shelled crustacean
Our souls combine me and you
like that time I spliced a Badger-Roo
Greasy drunk love with a twist
I want to share with you love's fist

Prepare for my pashion you will feel the brunt
When we make love hard in your...bedroom

Sexual-Lobster responds:

I want to share with you love's fist

love it!


2010-05-29 06:42:59

So strong like a zombie cure
Our love burns so damn pure
Cant take all this emotion
Making this loud commotion

Even with all of my flaws
You got caught in these claws
Like a fedora to a mobster
You belong to Sexual Lobster

Sexual-Lobster responds:

i clutch all that is dear to me in my pincers. winces. glimpses. err...


2010-05-29 06:51:13

Like a transformer my heart changed over time,
But you were always my optimus prime
I used to stab felines, now i stab at love
Replaced the fur of , for the feathers of doves

Relationships like highscores, are quite hard to keep
The white Columbidae flies and soars, the Felis Catus sleeps

Sexual-Lobster responds:

dude love the transformers lines!


2010-05-29 06:51:42

* fur of cats


2010-05-29 07:17:37

I think a spoken word thing on top of Squidhunting Manwhore would do quite nicely:

Like a bag of fresh puppies,
I could just squeeze you down
and throw you in a pond, tied to a rock

Ooh, you make me so happy
Kneel down, and lick the ground
I'll whip your back with my...


Sexual-Lobster responds:

squeeze you down?

mmnnnn Fernando is a soft and gentle lover, even if he is extremely creepy.


2010-05-29 10:52:11

My house tight and so are you
So come inside and i'll bend to
Your long strong entrance into my brain
filled with a creamy storm of love, hate and pain

I have a horn and you have a gash
Time for our creaming bodies to clash
Like a rhino mingled with a cat
foreplay will leave you blue and black

Mouth to anus, intestinal tract
Sharing one pipe packed
with warm fuzzy love filled juices
stampeding bed like a pack of mooses

Beef jerky and rancid red meat
Our body to body red hot treat
Reddening bedsheets, bodies leak
Limbs limp, white skin, job complete.

Sexual-Lobster responds:

i'm loving that last paragraph, and also these two lines:

Like a rhino mingled with a cat
foreplay will leave you blue and black


2010-05-29 11:52:21

so i do lock you in and leave the car running and you suffocate.
thats what you get you stupid bitch for cheating on me with ted

Sexual-Lobster responds:

zomg who's ted?


2010-05-29 11:56:22



2010-05-29 12:07:47

Fingers running through your hair
Our bodies glistening completely bare
Lovers all over the world shall hear our fable
Your beautiful eyes, my Tower Of Bable

Sexual-Lobster responds:

i've definitely never heard "Tower of Bable" used as an endearment before.


2010-05-29 13:04:12

gettin hotter by the second sting
my eruption will be your reckon-ing


2010-05-29 13:54:29

Try something including a goon, you can't go wrong with a goon.


2010-05-29 14:56:27




2010-05-29 15:08:54

LOVIN ALL THESE RHYMES! especially that one about paul being a walrus dududu


2010-05-29 15:16:03

one fish two fish
red fish blue fish



2010-05-29 16:29:28

It will be rapped by me? Cool.


2010-05-29 16:30:29

No complete ideas here, but I did come up with a few verses you might like:

When you caught my chocolate eyes
I got goosebumps upon my thighs
My anus tightened with desire
As my Latin heart was set afire

The sweet perfume of squid at dusk
Mixes well with Latin musk

Tears and screams of pain and pleasure
Are gifts that we will share forever

Sexual-Lobster responds:



2010-05-29 17:24:33

Fierce as a moose from the wild
Emotions that far from mild
Stop resisting and lets elope
Besides you cant tear that rope

The more you sweat, the more I lust
The more you cry, the more I thrust

I feel dirty

Sexual-Lobster responds:

i like that yours has a storytelling element to it...but i..uh..i'm not so keen on the story


2010-05-29 17:53:05

Your blue eyes gleam, skin soaked in sweat.
The best's still to come, it's not time yet.
Your bosom heaves, your nipples firm.
It's cute how against the ropes you squirm.

There is no safe word, never will be.
The gag's in place, squealing like a monkey.
I love your legs, your arms, your neck.
I wish you were tied to a railroad track.

But it's my turn to show you who's boss.
Like you have a right to tell me to floss?
Off with my pants, hope I don't regret this.
But I've always wanted to rape my dentist.

I'll clean your gums, I'll brush your teeth.
Then root your canal while I'm underneath.
No spitting, just swallow, there's no need to rinse.
'Cause you're so cute when you plead like this.

Sexual-Lobster responds:

wow you and rebornMCW above really ran with the sexual violence theme.

i suppose i was asking for it with the "want to lock you in my garage" line.

Fernando is a creepy dude but he's no rapist!


2010-05-29 19:21:08

They call me the pincher, a horny prawn
One night of passion and then I'm gone
"Please, stay with me" they silently beg
I say
"Close your heart girl, and open your legs"


Sexual-Lobster responds:

i like the first two lines


2010-05-29 19:21:34

Our rendevous reaches inception
No more pleas for contraception
Let me be clear and forthright
I'm here to be your sodomite

Sexual-Lobster responds:

fernando is no stranger to sodomy, but it's always consensual.


2010-05-29 19:48:06

Your reply and Edit made me laugh a lot and I thank you for this. I'll come up with something more for the kids!

Sexual-Lobster responds:

thanks for having a go!


2010-05-29 23:18:26

That ass is like a nice big fruit
when i touch it you say im a pervert brute

that doesnt rhyme i think

Sexual-Lobster responds:

sure it does!


2010-05-29 23:57:54

i hax u lolololol$$$$$$@@


2010-05-30 00:34:50

Tender as toast in the oven
Buttered up, ready for lovin'
Come and take a look in my brain
That mark right there is a love stain

You left it there the last we met
You'd walk by I'd begin to sweat
took a gulp, my heart is pumpin'
Blood is gushin' theres no stoppin'

Love for you is like 2 ligers
mixed with the spleens of 10 tigers
borrowed from Pleasure Island 2
Dont do drugs kids and stay in school!

Sexual-Lobster responds:

ha ha awesome, dude.


2010-05-30 01:48:21

Tie you down to a chair
Run my hand through your hair?


2010-05-30 17:11:42

Injure me with strong emotion
cure my soul with baby lotion
hurt my heart with heavy petting
shock my cubes on gentle setting

let me suffer your caress
make me cry with helplessness
feed me sweet amphetamine
dip me deep in sour cream

Spank my dignity with grace
knock my feelings out with mace
stab my heart and softly twist
love me with a loving fist!

Love me!!

Sexual-Lobster responds:

that's awesome, man!


2010-05-31 01:02:56

Bored so I stopped by to leave another

A love that burns like a fire
These rhymes it does inspire
To make you mine I'd kill a man
All with just a plastic fan

Always love to see your smile
Even for just a little while
Just say that you're mine
For our love is divine

Sexual-Lobster responds:

that second verse is downright sweet


2010-05-31 07:04:35

I'm the man who wet your dreams
voluptuous like a thousand spleens
I'm the god of greasy games
I burn like mustard in your veins

My breast is tender like a bear
my lips are smooth with facial hair
your nostrils moan a gentle sigh
my love is legal getting high

My burning kiss is chemical
it's turning bliss unethical
like pleasure in a rubber glove
I'm the thrubber lord of love

We bind in sacred bondage bonds
we merge like eels in viscid ponds
we melt like nympho crabs syringe
like beavers on an acid binge

Yea, do it!!

Sexual-Lobster responds:

yea, do it! MMMRRRNNNGGGHHH!!!

"I'm the god of greasy games
I burn like mustard in your veins"

v nice!


2010-06-02 01:34:32

Just like the pile of gourd, and the smell of durian, that I bought in Indonesia
As you move around, your perfume so fine, God, please give me euthanasia


2010-06-06 19:19:50

Leaking out of me like a flume
Im all greasy like a baboon
smelling strong but not as strong as my love
lick my leaky love and be taken above

Two girls and one cup is not enough
You are all that and an extra cup
And so I watch you day and day
Your motions blow my mind away

Find my tumourous love without care
Let me search for your body hair
I'll stroke it like my (now dead) puppy
I'll make your limbs feel floppy


2010-06-06 19:37:16

Told your mama it's no rumour
Love growing in me like a tumour
A medicinal pratictioner could even prove it
Though I won't let a pyschiatrist try and remove it

With analysis....
The antithesis....
Of my loco love....
for you.....


Soft in me like a glowing kitten
By the hand of zues I am love strikken
But it's you that's having me admitting
my crazy, loco, lumpy love for you

The lumps of a hippo
Flowing though me
The humps of a mole hill
Deep in my body

I am malignent and am going to die...
Of your love!

Sexual-Lobster responds:

soft in me like a glowing kitten...nice imagery, i'm thinking radioactive green


2010-06-06 23:40:33

Passions tumble in my Latin heart
Smoking cigars of Venus from the start
A strong man-scent makes any lady swoon
we'll stay up late to devirginate the goon

Sexual-Lobster responds:

haha nice you've been watching the old stuff!


2010-06-09 07:26:08

your hips your thighs,
they got me hypnotized
your lips your smile,
they got me mesmerized

so take my hand, why dont you?
ill take you for a ride
this aint no joke my baby
we gonna fly to the sky

We'll see russia and france
take you wherever you like
bomb the russians, dance with with romans
ill be your slave tonight.

My love for you is crazy
my love for you is fly
if you dont love me too my baby
im gonna jump this cliff and die

Sexual-Lobster responds:

nice iracruz, thanks!


2010-06-14 19:20:50

(I do write poetry from time to time... this would be my first trying to "Rap" it out)

Also after reading most of these rap lines, I keep on thinking of Insane Clown Posse's music. XD It's just that funny!

First I'll tie you upside down
Using leather from several towns
Then tickle you with a pillow
laughing while I play with my dildo


Sexual-Lobster responds:

ooh, playful yet...well...sadistic.


2010-06-18 09:51:34

Bit late..
But sharing is caring.

(Just trying to remain loyal to your incomplete lyrics. Crazy and spontaneous.
Done in 2 minutes or so in case this isn't the direction you were aiming toward. just don't like them lol.
Also i've sampled two styles. First; fast paced one-liner lyrics. Then second; longer, less mouth stuffing liners.)

(And yes, they do mean something aha)

Here's what iii got so far:

Snackin' lunchbox packin' porridge,
Bingin' love from store-bought storage.

Pocahontas, wild at heart,
Hercules don't pull apart!
Mild-mannered simpleton,
Possessing mindless skeleton.

Blissful banter, listening,
Love is like the following:

Laser-powered toy robot,
Party poppin' jager shot.
Fireworkin' blasting sky,
Kentucky fryin' candy pie.

Chewy chomping,
Romper stomping.
Sugar-pounding magic fling,

Peeper peeping,
Seeker seeking.
Leaking rainbow everything.

Calorific lust, and i'm feelin' the burn,
Forever persistent, just too stupid to learn.

Sexual-Lobster responds:

thanks horny henry!


2010-06-20 01:16:10

Now in the sewers, shall we lay
Jesus (Yes, Jesus) Came out gay
Now we love in this dank abyss
As I adore the hearts above your kids.

Chorus: I noticed that you need a man-do
Welcome to heaven, He's called Fernando

Now paradise is a walking man
Relax, It isn't that creep, Stan.
What is he? I can't care.
Now, relax in my chocolate stare.


We are the forest, you would see.
Your embrace are leaves to me.
Your caring is my own foil;
Now your eyes are tan mountain soil.

Chorus (4x)

Sexual-Lobster responds:

nice, mrRedux, thanks!


2010-06-23 19:58:48

You called it long before it happened: _pacific/10393918.stm


Sexual-Lobster responds:

all i will say is that when my lizard brethren tell me something, i listen...


2010-06-24 02:02:25

Of topic. What are your animartions going to be about with Kevin Rudd gone

Sexual-Lobster responds:

actually i wasn't planning on doing any more political ones anyway.

but were i to change my mind, there will always be politicians to send up.


2011-02-27 20:44:46

Every day I love you more
We test the boundaries of the law
I've loved you in a thousand ways
All involving mayonnaise
As I lay me down to sleep
I dream of you on me on sheep
Erotic dreams filled with power
Though you charge five bucks an hour
The only cross I have to bear
Is made of stolen pubic hair

When this was originally invented it was a seperate verse with the my father never loved me replaced by My friends just want my organs, with gooseman doing a creepy grin when he pats fernando on the shoulder.


2011-02-27 20:48:08

Every day I love you more
We test the boundaries of the law
I've loved you in a thousand ways
All involving mayonnaise
As I lay me down to sleep
I dream of you on me on sheep
Erotic dreams filled with power
Though you charge five bucks an hour
The only Cross I have to bear
Is made of stolen pubic hair


2011-03-22 05:23:22

I know a dark, but comfy place
A place where I'll caress your face
We'll cross our legs as we embrace
While in Fernando's Hideaway

Use the tune from 'The Pajama Game' for bonus points.


2011-05-29 02:25:10

Woah, you should combine most of these and make like a 10 minute song, that'd be awesome, Sexual-Lobster.